Beautiful Day

Still...no camera....not cool. So this past week was a really hard week for me. Josh had his mid-term due on Friday, so we never saw him. He leaves the house before 6 a.m. and would not get home until after I had the kids and myself in bed. Knowing that he has to get up so early in the morning I try to deal with the baby at night by myself...but sheesh...the kid won't be content for more than 2 hours at a time and it is killing me. Then I try to put him down for a nap...ya right. He will sleep in my arms or attached to my breast, but other than that he SCREAMS. So Thursday I had a mental break down. After we tried the nap time routine and he had been screaming for over an hour I just laid down next to him and cried. I then called Josh...why? I don't know, he was already stressed out, but someone had to know I was crying...right? Once I decided it was dumb to have called him, I called Mom. Forty five minutes later she had me calm and just as we hung up, Josh walked in the door. The tears started falling again because now I feel stupid that he came home to rescue me from two children, not that he has anything better to be doing. Of course, as soon as he comes home Braxton is on his best behavior and Josh is looking at me like I'm crazy. I was starting to wonder myself if I was. Anyways, he ended up going back to school after a little bit and took Trenton with him. Trenton thought it was great he got to go to school with Daddy and had a great time. So Friday he presented his project and it went really well. He sent me a text telling me so and again...I cried, but this time because I was so proud of him.
So now to the beautiful day part. We went out to get in the car yesterday to go to Costco and it was so nice out there. In the high 50's, sunny, no wind...absolutely gorgeous. So instead of going to Costco right away we headed up to the zoo. It was so nice to have our little family all together, Trenton running ahead of us yelling behind him for Daddy to hurry to see this or that animal (cause he is an expert at the zoo now!) Me trailing behind holding my sweet Little Love close to me in his sling as he looked around at all going on. I thought of each of my boys individually during this time and thought to myself what a wuss I was during the week...they are all perfect, right? It was just so nice to all be together, not rushed to be anywhere and all happy to be in each other's presence. Trenton is growing into such a good little boy and I can't believe he is almost 4. As Braxton was sleeping on me while Trenton was playing on the playground right before we left I was talking to Josh and just asking him how it happened so fast that I was holding Trenton on my shoulder as he slept and now he is going up and down slides all by himself. Is it going to go that fast with Braxton? I'm sure it is. I hate that. I love it when they are so small, except for the no sleeping part, and are so dependent and loving. Trenton is still loving, but wanting to do more and more on his own. That is good, I need to let him learn.
I am so grateful for the beautiful day we had. The family time that we got to spend together. I am thankful for my husband and all the hard work he does for our family. I am thankful for his patience with me and his love, especially when I am freaking out. I am thankful for Trenton and all his questions about everything in life. I would love for him to listen to me the first time I ask for him to do something...but we are working on that! I am thankful for the good big brother that he is everyday. I am thankful for Braxton and his huge gummy smile. I do love holding him and nursing him. I would love to do that all day every day, but life just doesn't allow moms to do that all the time. I love to watch him sleep and see his little tongue work like he is still sucking on his binki even though it has fallen out. I am thankful for listening ears and for comforting words. Life is stressful sometimes, but I am thankful to have family both near and far that I can call and just listening to their words help calm me. I am thankful for my life, and am excited to start a new chapter in it this year as we venture out of the school phase and into working full time. I am thankful for the beautiful day that made me realize it isn't really all that bad!